Love Songs: Listening to Couples

Author(s) : Perrine Moran

Love Songs: Listening to Couples

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Perrine Moran considers the power of popular love songs to trigger emotion and capture what is at the heart of couple dynamics. In songs, music and words – the non-verbal and verbal – combine to create a unit. In couples, two people create a unit that combines togetherness and individuality, a potentially problematic blend that poses a challenge.

The dilemma of how to be emotionally dependent on another without losing oneself underlies many issues that couples bring to therapy and is the stuff of many love songs. Its management results in different dynamics, which the chapters of this book identify. A psychoanalytic understanding of the connections between early, primary relationships and those formed in adulthood sheds light on the experiences of couples, whether or not they enter therapy.

Written in an accessible and relatable style, Perrine Moran brings psychoanalytic concepts to couple relationships through the medium of music. In her clinical work as a couple therapist, she often found herself thinking of a specific song that encapsulated something at the core of a couple. At other times, a song came to mind that captured a pattern repeated in a number of couples. Intrigued, Moran began to explore in depth the link between love songs and couples. The result is a book that focuses on different types of couple dynamics, such as disappointment, enmeshment, and difference, and the songs and case vignettes that best illustrate them.

Love Songs: Listening to Couples is ideal for practitioners and trainees working with couples and will appeal to a wide range of readers who enjoy popular music and are curious, for personal, academic or professional reasons, about couple dynamics and problematic interactions.

Table of Contents

Acknowledgements
About the author
Introduction

1. Connections
2. Push and pull: Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me
3. Disappointment: Don’t Think Twice, It’s All Right
4. Enmeshment: I’ve Got You Under My Skin
5. Difference: Somewhere . . .
6. The unspoken: If You Could Read My Mind
7. Separation: They Can’t Take That Away From Me

Afterword
References and song, film, and stage listings
Index

About the Author(s)

Perrine Moran, MA, is a psychodynamic psychotherapist and a couple psychoanalytic psychotherapist. She is a visiting lecturer and supervisor at Tavistock Relationships. She has taught psychoanalytic couple theory internationally as well as on two master’s programmes at Tavistock Relationships. She was a supervisor at the Tavistock and Portman NHS Foundation Trust. She is the arts editor for Couple and Family Psychoanalysis, and a member of the editorial board of the Revue of the International Association for Couple and Family Psychoanalysis. She is bilingual, works with individuals and couples in English and in French, and has a private practice in London.

Before training as a psychotherapist, Perrine Moran was a lecturer in French literature at the University of London, and an actress in Paris, where she ran a fringe theatre in the basement of a Cuban restaurant.

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